The Girl Who Cried Rape

by Alex Strandberg · 12 comments

***QUESTION FROM A READER***

Hey Alex,

I have run into some problems with an on again off again girlfriend of the past couple of years. I was cheated on by her and she lied about it. At first she claimed that she had been raped by this guy and later she confessed that she wasn’t. At the time I felt like it wasn’t really her fault and she deserved another chance but now I know that it was her fault.

I feel trapped by the situation because she is my first love and I feel like she could be the one but she has lied to me so many times before. We don’t go out now but we talk on a regular basis (she is literally obsessed with me). I feel stupid for falling for her lies over and over but I still have strong feelings for her. I have grown from the whole experience but am still very confused.

What should I do now? Should I break it off or find a way to get over it and go ahead with our new relationship?


***MY RESPONSE***

There are many people who say you can continue a relationship after being cheated on or doing the cheating. They claim that it’s possible to move on from that dark period and continue to love each other just the same as you first did when those three magical words entered the relationship.

The truth is that a relationship dies once you step outside of it, particularly in your case. It was your first love and first loves always come with a strong sense of innocence and vulnerability. The more open you are, the more it will hurt when someone betrays you like she did. Once your trust is broken it’s almost impossible to get that naive wide eyed feeling back.

It’s always a good idea to never fully trust someone until they prove that they are worthy of your trust. Blind faith will get you hurt over and over again unless you are extremely lucky.

During the time when she should have been building that trust she was sneaking around on you with another guy. Vulnerability of a first love combined with her not creating strong trust in the relationship will create a lot of trust issues.

The only way you could trust her now would be to constantly keep a close eye on her every single day or decide to ignore your intuition all together. You can only ignore your intuition about someone for so long so we will go with the other solution: constant surveillance. [click to continue…]

{ 12 comments }

How to Stop Being Nervous Around Beautiful Women

by Alex Strandberg · 18 comments

A few drinks deep and trying your best to fight off a migraine from the bass of the house music. Everyone is dancing, drinking and enjoying themselves but you stick to the back with your buddies to have another round. A blond enters your view and quickly catches your attention. Her ill fitting top caresses her tight, silky and artificially tanned body. It fits in all the right places and shows off all of the right parts.

She fills you with the excitement that so many women before her have. “What I wouldn’t give to f**k her!” is the only thought that crosses your mind. A thought so profound that you can’t help but to repeat it to your friends. They laugh and join in with their particulars of what they would do to the girl and what they would do to be able have her. Good times. You no longer see her but the contour and specifics of her body are burned into your mind for the rest of the night.

Sound familiar? I bet it does. You think nothing of it but it’s moments like these that cause you to be nervous around beautiful women and kill your chances of ever being able to be with that girl except in your masturbatory fantasies. When women see guys who show these types of behaviors they automatically get label as a wanker.


What is a Wanker?

A wanker is your typical average guy who sprays his shorts over every decent to hot looking girl that walks by. He is not concerned about whether or not this girl is a snob, a bitch, stuck up, controlling, sweet or has an amazing personality. The ONLY thing he cares about is the way she looks. It doesn’t matter if this girl is on the run from the cops for chopping off her husbands pecker and throwing it out a moving car but just as long as she is attractive he’s “happy.” [click to continue…]

{ 18 comments }

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The Story of Dick In the Community

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How to Be Confident Part Three-The Soul

Listening to the mind can be very detrimental to your confidence. Learning to escape the mind and re-connecting with your soul can help you develop real confidence that can not be shaken or broken for anything.
The greatest tool that you have at your disposal for cutting through the fog that the mind creates is meditation. [...]

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